Men and Women in the Bible
As we continue our series about the family (and Biblical Anthropology in general), let’s look at a few more Bible passages that talk to, or about, men and women.
It’s very interesting to see how the Bible talks about men and women. Now, of course, there are some cultural things – and I understand that that will be a matter of debate when it comes to some of these texts. But there really do seem to be some things that are universal. Let’s start in 1 Kings:
When David’s time to die drew near, he commanded Solomon his son, saying, “I am about to go the way of all the earth. Be strong, and show yourself a man, and keep the charge of the LORD your God, walking in his ways and keeping his statutes, his commandments, his rules, and his testimonies, as it is written in the Law of Moses, that you may prosper in all that you do and wherever you turn, that the LORD may establish his word that he spoke concerning me, saying, ‘If your sons pay close attention to their way, to walk before me in faithfulness with all their heart and with all their soul, you shall not lack a man on the throne of Israel.’
1 Kings 2:1-4
“Show yourself a man!” says David. How? “Keep the charge of the LORD your God”. So – women don’t have to do that? Well, of course they do. But look at what’s happening here. Solomon is taking over the leadership of a nation. He still feels very unready, very young, insecure. He needs courage to assume spiritual leadership.
As a matter of fact, Paul tells both men and women to “act like men”. How so? Well, there seems to be something that tends to be more characteristic of men in general – more natural for men – that should encourage everyone, including the women.
Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.
1 Corinthians 16:13
Young men, old men – be strong. Stand firm. Don’t let the world make you lose your balance. Defend the truth. Follow God in the midst of danger and hatred.
These are things we should all do. But they should especially be characteristics of a Christian man.
What about the women?
God has revealed Himself to us as a “Him”, not as a “her”. However, God is Spirit – He doesn’t have a body (except of course the one that the Lord Jesus took for Himself). And He has characteristics that we might associate more with men, or with women.
For example:
As one whom his mother comforts,
Isaiah 66:13
so I will comfort you;
you shall be comforted in Jerusalem.
God comforts his people as a mother comforts her children. And we, as men, can learn from women in this way. We, as men, can learn to be like God – by learning from women.
We won’t go through it today, but we have to mention to classic text, Proverbs 31. “An excellent wife who can find?”
Tell me about her! Well, she cares for her family. She knows how to find a bargain. She buys and sells and carries on business. She’s good with her hands. She helps the poor in her community.
Should men do these things? Sure, but perhaps women are especially gifted.
When I shared this at our church, I gave the following illustration. Two parents go to the park with their young child. The child was supposed to bring a jacket, but forget. And the whining starts. “I’m cold!”
On parent says, “You’re fine – stop whining. It’s your own fault you didn’t bring your jacket. Just run around and you’ll warm up in no time!”
The other parent says, “Oh, you poor thing. Here, just put my jacket on until we get home.”
Which parent is Mom, and which is Dad? I know, I know, there are exceptions. But I bet you can guess. At the very least, you know the expected answer, right?
There are things only men can do, there are things only women can do. There are things both can do. And, in general, there are things that one or the other tend to be better at.
In the case above, yes, children need to learn from their mistakes. And yes, sometimes children need comfort. Mom can learn from Dad, and Dad can learn from Mom. But each has their own strengths.
And each have their own sinful tendencies and weaknesses.
I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling;
1 Timothy 2:8
Men can be courageous. But they can also be very good at arguing and fighting. Anger, selfish irritation. We’re very good at that. Shouting.
So what should we do? Take those fists that are ready to fight, open them up, raise them, and pray, pray, pray.
What about the women?
likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire,
1 Timothy 2:9
Jewelry isn’t evil in itself. In fact, the woman in Song of Solomon is praised for her jewelry. But jewelry and make up can turn into an obsession – outward beauty can become all that’s important. And so that’s where all the time and money goes.
And so what does the apostle tell the women to do? Dress well – dress with modesty and self-control. Dress with good works. Maybe spend less time at the mirror in the bathroom, and more time at the mirror of the Bible. Serve others.
And so as women embrace their wonderful and beautiful femininity, men learn from them how to serve their family. And as men embrace their wonderful masculinity, women learn from them the strength of conviction in the truth.
We’re different. And we need to maintain the difference, as we talked about last time. But we also learn from one another. Because we were created to be unique and yet equal in Jesus Christ.
But that’s not what our society tells us. No – men should need nothing from anyone. Live for yourself! Gain power. And women – be discontented with your family. Demand your rights. Take what you want.
But the Bible teaches both men and women humble service to our families and communities. Using our unique abilities.
Today, many people are destroying their families, and even their own bodies, because they don’t understand what the Bible teaches us about the family.
Recently, I’ve been reading some books about some of the tyrannical governments of the last century, and how they tried to control people. And I’ve kind of been making a list in my head of some of the ways that people have fought against the lies and oppression of out-of-control leaders. One of the most important things on the list? Family.
Our families are not perfect. Maybe they’re actually very broken. But let Jesus into your family life any way you possibly can. Maybe there’s sin in your family. And you’ve suffered because of it. The Lord can bring forgiveness and healing, even though it may take time.
And remember that God uses the family as an example to the local church. We protect and help one another – especially those who don’t have a family of their own.
When you think that there can’t possibly be any hope in your life for purity, healing, or forgiveness, remember that Jesus our Saviour is greater than any problem we have.
Men – protect your family. Look for the lies that the world is telling them, and counter them with the truth. You’ll suffer for it, but it’s worth it. Women – care for your family. Strengthen them to face the dangers of the world. Remind them to pray and seek God’s comfort. Keep away the distractions and time-wasters that can keep your family from more important things.
And it’s the same even for those who aren’t married – help your family, your church family, and others in your circles.
Young men and women, you can do the same. As Paul said to Timothy:
Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work. So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.
2 Timothy 2:21-22
Children – the same things. Defend your families. Honour your parents and grandparents. Listen to their wisdom, and seek the wisdom of God’s Word. Ask questions. And what a blessing some in your family know the Lord.
The world under Satan wants to destroy families – separate children from parents, destroy marriages. They want us to have as few children as possible. They want to see your body destroyed. The world doesn’t want you to trust in God’s purposes, the purposes that actually set you free.
But don’t be afraid. Remember what John said – in this case, to “little children” – but we’re all learning together:
Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.
1 John 4:4